Some people are hard on folks who don't know any better.
But "not knowing" is more complex than it looks. There's the person receiving judgment for not knowing, the person frustrated with others who don't know, and the question of whether someone genuinely didn't know or just didn't want to.
These are three different scenarios that require three different frameworks. This series addresses all three.
Each guide stands alone, but they build on each other. Start where you need to, move through as needed.
GUIDE 1
"You Should Have Known Better"
Defense Against Unfair Judgment
Pattern recognition is a learned skill, not common sense. What looks "obvious" to someone with frameworks is invisible to someone without them. This guide is for defending yourself against people who judge you for not having information you literally didn't have access to yet.
For: People receiving criticism for "missing red flags" or "not knowing better" when they genuinely didn't have the pattern library yet
Read Guide 1
GUIDE 2
"I Know Better Now, Why Don't They?"
Managing Impatience with Others
Once you can see, it's hard to remember what it was like when you couldn't. This guide addresses the frustration that comes with watching others repeat patterns you've escaped, and how to offer information without forcing awareness.
For: Survivors who've developed pattern recognition and are getting frustrated with people still in the fog
Read Guide 2
GUIDE 3
"Didn't Know vs Didn't Want to Know"
Distinguishing Real Ignorance from Willful Blindness
Not all "I didn't know" is the same. Some people genuinely lacked information. Others avoided information that would require them to change. This guide teaches you to recognize the difference and protect yourself accordingly.
For: Anyone learning to distinguish genuine ignorance from strategic ignorance, and understanding when to extend grace vs when to set boundaries
Read Guide 3