Every behavior is a signal. Every signal has a meaning. Every meaning lives in the nervous system. Every pattern has a repair move. This is how I work.
Four layers. One system. This is how I help you see what's actually happening underneath the story.
What behavior is showing up? What are they doing? What are you doing? This is the surface layer, the thing you can actually see and describe.
Most people get stuck here, arguing about the behavior instead of understanding what it means.
What is the behavior actually trying to communicate? Every action is an attempt to meet a need, protect from a threat, or regulate an overwhelming feeling.
The meaning isn't always what it looks like. Withdrawal might mean "I'm flooded and can't process," not "I don't care."
Where is the body in this moment? Fight, flight, freeze, fawn, or faint? The nervous system state determines what's possible. You can't think clearly when you're dysregulated.
This is why logic doesn't work in heated moments. The body has to come down first.
What's the one thing that could shift this pattern? Not fixing everything, just the next right move. A script to use. A pause to take. A signal to send.
Repair moves are small, specific, and nervous-system-informed. They break the loop.
Instead of getting lost in the content of arguments, you'll start seeing the shape underneath. Once you see it, you can't unsee it.
Their words might be wrong, but their signal is usually clear. I help you hear what they're trying to communicate, even when they're doing it badly.
Your reactions aren't random. They're your nervous system doing its job. When you understand your wiring, you stop being hijacked by it.
Not vague advice like "communicate better." Real scripts. Real moves. Things you can try in the next 24 hours.
"Your patterns are not your fault. Learning them is your power."
The whole point of this work
Start with a quiz to map what's running, or book a call to get a real-time translation.
Take a Quiz → Book a Call